Childhood: equal or unequal?

Once a month, a group of people gather around the lunch table; we not only share lunch but also a discussion about a specific topic. The past two discussions have centered on ‘childhood’. Not MY childhood especially, or another’s specified era, but childhood in general. I guess it’s not exactly an innovative thought that not everyone’s childhood looks alike.

I grew up in a homogeneous rural community in the 1950s. Opportunities were pretty much the same for everyone. If you had the interest, and the money, you sent your children off to college. Everyone else worked in blue collar jobs, served in the Armed Forces, and/or started a family right after high school. But even in my generation, all childhoods did not look alike. Rural community childrearing looked different from urban childrearing. Socioeconomic levels did have an impact then, but, surprisingly, not as much as they do today.

Annette Lareau, author of Unequal Childhoods, highlights how the intersection of race and class has a great deal to do with family life: how we groom our children to not only perceive the world differently, but act and react in that world differently. The work is a culmination of a large field study on family life in various classes, races and cultures. Lareau categorized childrearing in two ways: Concerted Cultivation and the Accomplishment of Natural Growth.

Concerted Cultivation draws upon the determined effort of the parents to cultivate the development of a child by gifting them with as many opportunities as possible. Children grow up feeling accomplished and entitled to certain amenities in the adult world. Within to this type of child rearing, organized activities such as sports and music lessons is a major element. Family time is centered on children’s sports schedules or other organized events. Often the family budget suffers dramatically as a result of extra-curricular activities, but parents deem it a worthwhile investment. Parents of middle class families focus on the education system and are heavily involved. Parents feel all of these things give the child a leg up in the adult world of cooperation, teamwork and business ventures.

The Accomplishment of Natural Growth, according to Lareau, manifests itself more often in working class and poor families. The child’s life is organized around family events with less emphasis on structured sports and events that cost a lot of money. Neighborhoods provide playmates and areas to play. Children know about money issues and are accountable for their own spending. Parents do not unequivocally supply the latest and greatest gadget.

There are definitely benefits and disadvantages for both ways of raising children and everyone in the group certainly had their own thoughts on the subject. The group consensus so far is that some children who are given everything, grow up with an over-inflated sense of entitlement and power. As a whole we felt healthy self-esteem comes from validating feelings, giving an appropriate amount of freedom and power, and nurturing compassion and passion within. We talked about classes -- middle and working, and we shared what we felt were the ‘best practices’ for childrearing. Again, not innovative thoughts and perhaps a bit academic, but all our comments emphasized our being able to do the best we can with what we have. We call it ‘the good enough’ parent.

So what are your thoughts? Do you feel sports, recreational and extracurricular activities, and the latest in technology foster teamwork, cooperation and increased knowledge in kids as they move into adulthood? Do you feel providing no-cost to low-cost recreational activities set examples of hard work and personal accountability? Should parents strike a balance between the two? Tell us what you think.

Submitted by Jane McCauley

How to Manage Nutrition and Rising Food Prices

The sharp increase in food prices over the past couple of months has raised serious concerns about the food and nutrition situation of people with low incomes. Many people feel healthier food is more expensive, but eating fast food because of its convenience and low cost is not necessarily a good choice, either -- especially in the long run for obvious health reasons. Since many of our participants escaping abuse leave with virtually nothing in order to secure safety, YWCA Rock County turned to nutrition consultant, Stephanie Tuss of Foods for Wellness for tips on making the most out of our trips to the grocery store, including making economical, healthy and nutritious choices for you and your family.

Top 10 Simple Strategies for Surviving the Supermarket
Stephanie Tuss, Nutrition Consultant

A wise man once said that you “either fail to plan or you plan to fail.” That’s’ the key to surviving a supermarket. You may feel like it’s more expensive to eat healthy, but if you go in with a plan, you will find yourself saving money and taking care of your health and the health of your family at the same time. Below is a list of strategies that will help you create a plan and stick to it!

1. Bring a list and follow it! Make a menu plan for the week and consult the store ads and coupon offers to see what is on sale that week so you can incorporate it into your plan. Especially watch for sales on meats, and if there’s

a good deal. Stock up.
2. NEVER go grocery shopping hungry.
3. Stick to the outer aisles of the store first and avoid the aisles that aren’t on your list.
4. Never-ever eat in the store or in the car on the way home…this goes back to strategy #2.
5. Beware of the sample ladies…just say no thank you!
6. Skip the specials. It’s not a deal if it’s not on the list.
7. Buy local to save money. The summer is the best time to stock up on inexpensive nutrient rich foods. Visit the

farmer’s market on the weekend, but wait until closing time to purchase anything. Most farmers would rather give

you a deal than see their produce go to waste. Buy LARGE quantities and freeze it.
8. Buy bulk sizes of items that you use frequently and have a longer shelf life like brown rice, whole grains and dried

beans. Store them in Ziploc bags in a dark and dry place.
9. Marinate chicken breasts with your own healthy marinades rather than buying pre-marinated meat.
10. Make your own healthy salad dressings using equal parts olive oil and vinegar, mustard, and your choices of herbs. http://www.foods4wellness.com/

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More food for thought:

“Twenty-three percent of the nation’s lower income classes are obese, compared with 16 percent of the middle and upper classes … Large supermarket chains (the best bet for affordable, fresh and healthy foods) abandoned less affluent city neighborhoods, focusing instead on the suburbs … A 1997 USDA study found that food prices, including those for produce, are, on average, 10 percent higher in inner-city food markets than they are in the suburbs … There are three times as many supermarkets in wealthy neighborhoods as in poor ones, according to a 2002 study in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine …” (Goodman 2003, pp. 137-158).

Mother's Day and the YWCA

The United States celebrates Mother's Day on the second Sunday in May. In the United States, Mother's Day was loosely inspired by the British and was imported by social activist Julia Ward Howe after the American Civil War. However, it was intended as a call to unite women against war. In 1870, she wrote the Mother's Day Proclamation as a call for peace and disarmament. Howe failed in her attempt to get formal recognition of a Mother's Day for Peace. Her idea was influenced by Ann Jarvis, a young Appalachian homemaker who, starting in 1858, had attempted to improve sanitation through what she called Mothers' Work Days. She organized women throughout the Civil War to work for better sanitary conditions for both sides, and in 1868 she began work to reconcile Union and Confederate neighbors.

When Jarvis died in 1907, her daughter, named Anna Jarvis, started the crusade to found a memorial day for women. The first such Mother's Day was celebrated in Grafton, West Virginia, on 10 May 1908, in the church where the elder Ann Jarvis had taught Sunday School. Originally the Andrews Methodist Episcopal Church, this building is now the International Mother's Day Shrine (a National Historic Landmark). From there, the custom caught on — spreading eventually to 45 states. The holiday was declared officially by some states beginning in 1912. In 1914 President Woodrow Wilson declared the first national Mother's Day, as a day for American citizens to show the flag in honor of those mothers whose sons had died in war.

Nine years after the first official Mother's Day, commercialization of the U.S. holiday became so rampant that Anna Jarvis herself became a major opponent of what the holiday had become. Mother's Day continues to this day to be one of the most commercially successful U.S. occasions. According to the National Restaurant Association, Mother's Day is now the most popular day of the year to dine out at a restaurant in the United States.

-borrowed from Wikipedia

This Mother's Day, we ask you to keep mothers from all over the world in mind as they continue to work to end war, improve life, end suffering, stand up for causes, and so much more. To contribute to the YWCA Mother's Day Campaign, visit http://ywcarockcounty.kintera.org/momsday

And on behalf of everyone here at YWCA Rock County, Happy Mother's Day to you and your family!

Economic Inequality: educate yourself, and solutions!

Parts 1,2, and 3 of this series looked at the ways the economic system is set up to the detriment of female workers. Pay equity issues affect not only individual wage-earners, but the community as a whole.

I wish that I had the answers, but I am just a working woman dealing with the consequences. I do know that there are several current relevant pieces of legislation: the Fair Pay Restoration Act, the Paycheck Fairness Act, and the Fair Pay Act.

I also know that every year since 1923 the Equal Rights Amendment goes in front of the congress—and almost every year Congress manages to simply ignore it, but maybe the time has come to pass it. In 1848, Mott and Stanton wrote, and I believe: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men and women are created equal.”

(Editor's note: Some helpful links in the info box. Oh, and about those local solutions? Learn more about the YWCA Women's Economic Empowerment Center, which we're launching this year with help from the Women's Fund and other local supporters. Visit: www.ywca.org/rockcounty and go to economic empowerment under Programs.)